I had this notion today that perhaps I will get something done. I found the floor in my room, and my bookshelf is relatively organized right now. There is actually room for my school stuff... now that's pretty radical.
I found my ring, you know, my 10 stone, quarter carat one. It's amazing how loose it is. It barely fit my left ring finger after I had it refitted when I got it. Now it's loose on my right ring finger. I'm going to start wearing it again. It'll probably give people the wrong idea... haha. I want to get it to the point where that ring falls right off my finger. I know it's possible, I'm just lazy. I did set a goal to lose another 25 pounds this quarter. It's doable. I'm starting it now.
From my expeirence, I need to clear up my mind first. The amount of clutter in my room is really a reflection of what is going on in my mind. If somehow I can clear up this physical clutter, I can think better and be more motivated. I guess I've been a bit depressed lately, and my mess really built up. but I found my floor today! weee! I even arranged my closet today, so I can find my shirts and they're not all mixed up. I'm working on it, working on it. I'm starting to recognize that I can never get everything I want to do done in the amount of time I give myself. Sometimes I just have to pick my battles.
So I guess this is another one of my ramblings that barely makes sense. There are just so many things I usually leave unsaid. It's not like I don't want to write about it, it's just that I can't. Those are usually thing things that are bothering me. I know I'm totally fucked up in the head. I guess I just have to find somebody just as messed up as I am. It isn't that hard eh? haha..
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LOL! Congrats on finding your floor and your ring! Did you happen to find your camera yet too?
ReplyDeleteThe other day I took on arm, swooped it over the desk and knocked it all on to the floor. I hate having a messy desk and bedroom, and most of it was Shawn's paper crap from work. Other people's clutter greatly agitates me..nearly to the point of violence.
I agree though, I think the physical clutter and mess also builds up when you're depressed. Just diving in and organizing it all helps clear my mind, and I find it easier to focus.
Your rambling made sense to me. Mentally I know I'm completely fucked up, and I don't need anyone to tell me so. I think entirely too much. I have all of this shit crammed in my mind that I used to fear letting out. I was always so worked up over being judged or offending. It got to the point that I just spill it, I'm tired of trying to be considerate of other people's feelings all of the time when in the long run I was the one really hurting. Not saying this is the case for you at all, just sayin' and rambling. If people don't like what I'm thinking that can stick up their ass. It's a good motto really. ;) What's the Dr. Seuss quote?...."Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." :) Whoa...okay, sorry. I'm stepping out of this comment box, 'cause I've truly filled it up and I'm sure none of it is even relevant to what you were getting at. I'm such a 'tard like that.
I think there is a messed up soul out there for all of us. :)
Well, perhaps in the process of the jealousy channeled cleaning you'll find your flash cards. *snickers* Once you're room is spic and span, get over the jealousy...I hear it's bad for your health. :)
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